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RankRanker (Rank Ranker “Free SEO System and Link Exchange With Extra Earning”) SPAM

Author: Gabriel Goldenberg, January 20, 2008

I’ve gotten two emails from a certain “RankRanker@gmail.com” (aka “webmaster@RankRanker.com”) trying to sell me their “Free SEO System and Link Exchange With Extra Earning”. While spam email pitches for terribly named, grammar-rule-flaunting, “get rich quick” systems (NEW: Now With An SEO Twist!) are high on my priority list of things to pay attention to, that I’m going to have to politely decline the offer. I’m so busy considering SEO pitches from Traffic Power, Network Solutions, and Vijayinfo.in that I have no time to consider an additional SEO system — even if it does come “with extra earning!”

However, I’d like to commend them for writing me these excellent, highly professional emails. They’re clearly way ahead of the rest of the industry’s best practices for email and have no need to pay attention to other SEOs’ inferior ideas. Besides which, SEO is about the individual’s power, not about the network. So more power to you for writing such great email pitches for your SEO system, RankRanker!

Date: 1/20/2008
By : SEO Team of RankRanker
Subject : Free SEO System And Link Exchange With Extra Earning.Dear Webmaster,

You know what the best part is? RankRanker make it soooo easy for you. You don’t have to keep your ear to the ground. You don’t have to practice. You don’t have to make mistakes. All you have to do is follow the simple instructions in this easy-to-use automated system of SEO.

Our Marketing department has visited your attractive site especially “the Home page”. Your relevant site theme attracted a lot and compelled for sharing with you an entire new concept, where you can earn with the help of (SEO) RankRanker.com, it’s a Business linking platform which contains One-way, Two-way and Three-way automated linking.

Free-Registration offer for limited time.

We would love to have you our partner in this new Evolutionary Automated System of SEO. You are just a click away to become a free member of this exciting SEO system. Click the link below NOW!

http://www.rankranker.com/regiter.aspx [ED: Did you mean register? Yeah, I also hate it when my spam links are broken because of typos…]

Special Area for you.

You can earn Dollars.
You can optimize your own site. (SEO)
You can get SEO Techniques, strategies, Tips & Trick.
You can get free software’s and helping books.
You can get advice from our experts and international analyst.
You can make your site as useful as yours seems to be.

Silver & Gold Plans

We have two major plans for our users, Gold and Silver feature plans.

WE ARE GLAD TO ANNOUNOCE THAT FIRST 500 REGISTRATIONS WILL COME UNDER SILVER PLANS THROUGH LUCKY DRAW FOR FREE This offer stays only for first one month after RankRanker launching.

We also have “Auto Advance plan” as future enhancement to maximum facilitate our visitors, towards fully automated Link exchange system. (coming soon).

More and more people are subscribing because of great results against MOST ECONOMICAL PRICE, your site will reach a very broad range of potential and will adjust in our home page if you avail our feature or advance plan.


NOTE: We have launched Beta version of RankRanker.com & need your precious feedbacks & comments to improve our functionality and maturity of our unique SEO product. On inauguration we are please to inform that in first month all of our honorable visitors can avail paid area/plans for free.
Best Regards
webmaster@rankranker.com

Also, I’m highly appreciative of their persistence, which they demonstrated by resending me the same email which I ignored the first time. This clearly shows a marked determination to help me improve my email’s spam filters - thanks guys!

Cold-calling is a tried and true sales tactic. It may not be as effective as search marketing, because it’s classical interruption marketing as opposed to permission marketing, but it still exists today because it does work. For it work, however, you need to understand that it’s a volume game. Some tiny percentage will convert. And much as I hate spam, I recognize that even some spam emails do convert.

I’ve got to wonder though: if you’re going to use spam, why would you try it on someone who’s going to out you? And why annoy someone who’ll give you reputation management issues (like 1 and 1’s issues)? Silly RankRanker (aka Rank Ranker aka webmaster@rankranker.com). What do you guys think about unpersonalized spam emails like this? Any experiences to share? Funny stories? Others who’ve gotten stuff from RankRanker@gmail.com?

(P.S.: If you link here, please use “RankRanker” “Rank Ranker” “RankRanker.com” and related anchor text. On a related note: go find out why Web Hosting Geeks suck. Also, do see 20 steps on Web Search PR - those “clueless numpties.”)

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Comments

  1. Hi Webmaster!

    Oh this is funny on sooooo many levels.

    My favorite:

    “You can make your site as useful as yours seems to be.”

    Wonderful, that’s exactly the results I have been searching for yet have hitherto failed to achieve.

    :-P

    Comment by Linda Bustos — January 20, 2008 @ 8:17 pm

  2. It is pretty good, I have to say. Gotta love that quality outsourced SEO ;).

    Comment by Gab — January 20, 2008 @ 10:11 pm

  3. Lol :)

    An enjoyable writing style, Gab, you should stick to it :)

    As for spam, oh, I receive tons of it daily (considering I have about 30 email accounts that I manage from Outlook) and I stopped paying attention to it long ago…

    Comment by Ann Smarty — January 21, 2008 @ 6:59 am

  4. Glad you liked it Ann :)! It’s funny, I just checked my email and I’ve got another one from these buggers! Please do link here with some rankranker anchor text so we can nail these buggers!

    Comment by Gabriel Goldenberg — January 21, 2008 @ 12:21 pm

  5. You’ve got to hand it to their copywriter. He’s got a real way with words…

    Comment by Mike - Twenty Steps — January 29, 2008 @ 6:32 am

  6. He’s got the Oxford mind trust staring in awe.

    Comment by Gabriel Goldenberg — January 29, 2008 @ 12:47 pm

  7. Give the copywriter a break! his last job was composing emails for winners of the Nigerian International Lottery!

    Comment by DarkMatter — January 29, 2008 @ 4:38 pm

  8. Heya Dark,

    He’s named Edith Kouame? She’s my favourite purveyor of winning Nigerian lottery tickets, West African inheritances etc.

    BTW, did you come through the Twenty Steps link?

    Comment by Gabriel Goldenberg — January 30, 2008 @ 2:16 am

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